The Making of Mila

As most of you know, baby Mila Eve Morganti was born on 2/3 at 3:41 PM, weighing in at 7lb 7oz and measuring 21 in. We are at home now, and I started writing this post a week ago, but turns out this whole having a baby business is very time consuming! She's all, "feed me now" and "I pooped myself" and "wah" and "oops, I pooped myself again." So now, 11 days later, I'll try to sum up the arrival of Mila.

On 1/25 I attempted to induce labor on my own by taking a spill down the basement stairs. This happened just hours before my parents were supposed to be in town, thus foiling their plans of walking me nonstop until the baby fell out ... clearly the walking would have been a moot point anyhow, seeing as how a free fall downstairs did nothing but bust up both ankles and leave a giant gash in my chest.

It was wonderful seeing my parents, they did so much for us while they were here. We had a great visit; I had desperately missed having them around during my pregnancy. They bought me an awesome rocking chair for Mila, did lots of yummy cooking (they are probably still fuming about the grocery prices in the northeast), and of course my dad did lots of handy work around the house (thanks for fixing the drain dad!). While the visit was great, I think even they would agree that, after a week:

((1 husband + 2 parents + 3 dogs + 1 injured preggo) x (overdue baby))/4 room house = 1 baby that clearly has a decent sense of humor!

Our house is tiny, and the room they were staying in is Mila's future nursery...basically there was a two foot perimeter around the double bed in their room. They did not complain once (at least not within earshot), but I'm sure they are glad to be back in their very spacious, very tidy and very not in Philadelphia house.

Below are highlights and low lights of the hours leading up to Mila's arrival:

Monday 2/1: Dr appt in the AM with parents and Chris in attendance to find out if the Dr will induce me since I'm past my due date. Doc also gives me a script to get my ankle x-rayed from my fall last week and schedules an induction for 2/8 (and indicates she won't induce before that). At this point, I am less than 1cm dilated, but my blood pressure is high - so I am sent to labor and delivery for monitoring. Spend a few hours in the hospital, blood pressure is fine, baby is fine, monitor is showing that I'm having light contractions every 13 minutes - at this point I only slightly even notice them. We decide to all go to lunch and afterwards I drop back by the hospital to have my ankle x-rayed...turns out ankle/foot is fractured. Of course it is . After several phone calls between my OBGYN a podiatrist and an ortho, I end up with a walking cast/boot and an appointment for tomorrow morning. Later that evening, my good friend Rikki stops by with her sister, who is a massage therapist. There apparently are pressure points on your feet that can induce labor - and since dad is scheduled to leave in 48 hours, I thought it couldn't hurt to try. She massages the good foot for a few minutes; prior to their arrival at my house, I had been noticing contractions more - although they were still around 13-15 minutes apart and really just slightly uncomfortable.

Tuesday 2/2: I think the foot massage must have worked, because as the night wears on, I start to notice the contractions more, and by 3AM I am crying because of the pain but the contractions are still 10 minutes apart. I try to wait until the contractions are 3-5 minutes apart, as instructed by my doctor, but by 5AM I am in so much pain that I make the call when they are 7 minutes apart. Now mind you that I was walking around on a fractured leg for a week, so I think we can all agree that I have a decent pain tolerance threshold (b/c I'm a bad ass - j/k), so when I say I was in pain...I mean it. I anticipated that the whole pushing process would be brutally painful, I was not prepared for the pain of contractions. Why the hell don't they prepare you for that pain? Why the hell didn't any of you readers prepare me for that? My biggest fears were the pushing and the boob feeding - seriously, you couldn't have warned me?? No amount of breathing techniques made it any more bearable, and just sitting here reminiscing about it is making me sweaty. Anyways, the on call doctor tells me to come to the hospital, and I spend the next 5 or so hours hooked up to monitors, with intense contractions every 4-7 minutes - but I'm still dilated less than 1cm. I am told that basically I have the option of going home and waiting it out or getting on a morphine drip in the hospital to get some sleep and relax. For reasons beyond my own comprehension at this point, I decided to go home - I think I figured it would be better being at home for hours rather than in the hospital. Silly girl.

Lucky for me, the midwife on duty has seen me come in and out of labor and delivery over the past few weeks with my other fall, with the high blood pressure, and she notices my new boot on the fractured leg...she has pity on me and says regardless of what happens to come back at 7PM that night and she will induce me and that I won't have to wait until 2/8 as my doctor instructed.

At home I lay (or is it lie? any English majors?) in bed and basically spend time crying, screaming, and sleeping. My OBGYN ends up calling me at home, to inquire about my foot - I thought she was calling regarding my recent trip to labor and delivery. I start talking to her about getting induced at 7, turns out she didn't know...and she disagrees with the decision - which normally wouldn't matter, but because she was the doctor on call for that evening after the midwife that planned to induce me, she would be the one ultimately delivering the baby, so she had the authority (apparently?) to veto the decision to induce me. She instructs me to go back to the hospital to get on a morphine drip to just get some sleep, but that she would not induce me until 2/8.

Back at the hospital at 5PM on 2/2, I get the morphine, then the nurses decide to have me move rooms, do IVs, etc....so basically I miss the window of sleepy time and end up staying awake despite the drugs. The next 10 hours or so are a blur of pain, sweating, crying, and some sleeping. Finally around 3 or 4AM on 2/3 I get the epidural. Again, this is something I had been dreading. I'm a bit of a wuss when it comes to needles and my pre labor fears had been focused on the whole needle in my spine process - HOWEVER, once that time finally arrived, I don't think I would have cared if they inserted the drugs with a jackhammer in my spine - anything to make the horror of the contractions less noticeable. Within 10 minutes of receiving the epidural, I was feeling A OK and I think I finally got some decent sleep - although I don't remember the next few hours very well. The entire morning and early afternoon of 2/3 were spent at 9cm, and around 2PM they gave me more of the good stuff in my back because I was starting to feel everything again.

At approx 3, two nurses are at my bedside refilling IVs and all of sudden move the fetal heart monitor on my belly - they then abruptly tell me to roll over on my side. Then they tell me to roll over on my other side... two more nurses appear and they are all whispering to each other and I start freaking out. Next thing I know the doctor is there, I am hysterical crying because I don't understand what is happening, and they are telling me I have to push NOW. Just 10 minutes earlier the doctor was telling me that because this was my first baby the pushing process could take up to 3 hours - now she was telling me I had to get the baby out asap. Needless to say I was panicked, but my fear for the baby and the fact that I couldn't feel a damn thing because I had just been given the refill of the epidural allowed me to get her out fairly quickly.

I still can't believe it happened. I look at her sleeping here now and can't believe she was living in my belly...my mom asked me if I remembered what I said when they put her on my tummy. According to her, my first words when they put my beautiful baby girl on me after her birth, were something along the lines of, "Jesus Christ, that just happened...." That seems like something I would say.

I can't believe they let us leave the hospital with her, I can't believe she is sleeping here in between Chris and I on the couch, I can't believe I am a mother, I can't believe that life with Mila has begun, and I can't believe how in love with her I am.

I love you mom, I think I get it now.